It is my opinion that the proof of the succesful implementation of democracy in a nation is the ability to protest. To protest safely without the fear of reprisal from the authorities, or in less friendlier nations, being tossed into the back of a van and never be seen again. Such protests can be large-scale gatherings of thousands, or a single individual wishing to express their personal displeasure. The protestors must stick to the rules. No vandalism, no rioting and certainly no violence. Doing any of these makes a mockery of the whole idea of protesting in a viable and sustainable democracy. As the old, and oft misattributed, adage goes “I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.” The right to protest peacefully on any issue should become the gold standard by which democracy should be judged, rather than faked and forced elections that merely ensure a place at the UN dining table and access to IMF funds. While all protests are to be treated equal, that is not to say all protestors should be.
Watching a news report I had the fortune to see a protestor in the Middle-East proudly brandishing a sign reading, “Deth to Amerikans”. It did not have the desired effect. For a protest to be taken seriously, the protestors themselves have to be serious. Regardless of whether or not English is your first language, a sign with such spelling errors fails to deliver on the sinister promise of mass genocide. Rather one appears to be unintelligent, idiotic and uncivilised. It is a bit like when a completely drunk, one-legged man who has lost his prosthesis challenges to “kick your ass” in a bar fight. Unfortunately spelling errors are not the only way a protest can be completely derailed by a poor sign. Take these too gems, “Die for something…is better than love for nothing…” and “BEHEAD those that say ISLAM is violent”. For the first, I am certain something got very lost in the translation, but I do enjoy the overuse of ellipses, suggesting that there are more pearls of wisdom in store. Hopefully something like, ‘live for nothing…give for everything…’ or ‘die for everything…give me something’. I suggest the sign maker apply for a job at the advertising agencies associated with those shoe companies that adopt meaningless drivel as their slogans. As for the second sign, well besides the obvious, I love the way ‘behead’ and ‘Islam’ are in bold. Most world religions try to avoid such connections. Word associations such as ‘Catholicism and paedophile’, ‘Hinduism and child bride’, ‘Judaism and bacon sandwich’, ‘Orthodoxy and funny hats’ and ‘Protestantism and meh, whatever’ should be avoided at all costs.
I don’t want to give the impression that I am picking on the non English-speaking Muslim world. Believe you me, the signs of some English speaking protestors are just as ridiculous, if not more so as they a written in their mother tongue. Remember the ‘I HAVE A DRAEM’ and ‘I HAVE A DERAM’ of Obama supporters during the US election campaign. There were racist jokes abound due to the fact the supporters were African American,…meanwhile in the village of Crestwood a sign endorsed by the mayor read, ‘English is our Langauge / No exections / Learn it”. While protesting in favor of tax reform in the US a brave protestor held up the sigh, ‘Get a Brian / MORANS!’. Not too sure who this Moran is and why on earth does he need Brian? Same cause different protest, ‘NOW LOOK! / Nice People Forced to / PROTEST / This Must Be Serious / We Came Unarmed This Time’. I love the little passive-aggressive ending to this one. Then there was the activist with the sign, ‘Woman Right Now!’. Either this protestor has serious spelling issues or, and I’m solely inferring this from her haircut and attire, was merely a lesbian at the rally making an urgent demand for a life partner.
The Christian nut jobs of the Westboro Baptist Church, infamous for protesting at the funerals of fallen soldiers, are very meticulous in their sign making. Their disgusting messages are not worthy of being repeated here, but as a Christian group they really should check their punctuation. “GODS” and “GOD’s” are not interchangeable. “GODS MESSAGE” suggests more than one god, perhaps a plethora, a pantheon. I missed out on a lot of Sunday school, but I thought Christianity had one God, infallible in all. However, the existence of the Westboro Baptist Church suggests that even God makes mistakes.
While I believe protests should be taken seriously, I also believe that others should have a right to comment on them. This has been done brilliantly by several individuals joining the protestors with their own signs. Amidst a group of women’s right activists a sole man holding the sign, ‘Make me a Sandwich!’. At a gay rights rally, ‘I can’t believe we still have to protest this crap!’, and killing two birds with a single stone, ‘War is Immoral / Gays are fabulous’. Others include, ‘Except for Ending Slavery / Fascism / Nazism / WAR HAS NEVER SOLVED ANYTHING,’ ‘The Only Bush I Trust Is My Own,’ ‘If Guns Kill People / Do pencils misspell words?’, ‘I Fought Nazis / and they don’t look like / Obama’, and ‘F*CK THE POPE….but remember to use a condom.’ Then there are those who desire to protest without a cause. A protestor stands among the anti-war demonstrators proudly lifting his sign high, ‘My Arms Are Tired’. In among a throng of Tea Party taxation protestors this pops up, ‘END GLEE THEME NIGHTS’, along with, ‘Where’s Waldo?’. Finally there are those that are merely there for the spirit of the affair. ‘I’M SO ANGRY I MADE THIS SIGN!’, ‘Down with bad stuff!’, ‘People Against / People who Protest’, ‘We believe in / Blah-blah-blah’, ‘Pacman Hates Ghosts,’ and ‘ماكدونالدز / relax / it says McDonald’s’.
Then we have the winner, a single sign that sums up the spirit and integrity of protests. It was hoisted aloft by a man during the recent protests in Egypt. It was not witty, it was not even well written, but it was direct, succinct and translated the man’s position very clearly. ‘MUBARAK / You go Away / I go Home / The End.’
